Deep inside my heart ~

What happens when the steps you take forward just become 10 steps back?
when you look in the mirror and not even sure of whose looking back?
I wonder sometimes,
Is my life even worth turning around?
I just wonder sometimes.
Should I pull faith or the trigger?
either way it kills me.
That's when they say, "turn it over to GOD"
but what happens when you no longer know what to even pray for?
These days, its all or nothing,
when you literally give your all and get...N.O.T.H.I.N.G
Sometimes I just wonder,
when I fall, is it worth even getting back up again?
When all hope just becomes lost,
every laugh stops,
and every smile is just a cover to hide what really lies.
Sometimes I wonder
if maybe this really is the end.
will I see tomorrows sunrise? or just tonight's sunset.
I just wonder sometimes.
What happens when the comfort you long for the most is no where to be found.
when the difference between reality and beliefs become a confusion?
you appear to have all the answers,
when really it remains a mystery.
Sometimes I wonder,
where to move when my life is at a standstill,
when everything around you falls apart,
If I attempt to put the puzzle back together, where do I even begin?
I just wonder sometimes
Sometimes its the smallest decisions that changes your life forever.
I wonder about all the ones Ive made so far?
I blame myself for being so vulnerable of my own weakness.
Once again letting something or someone steal my pride.
So what happens when there is nothing left to say,
nothing else to possibly do,
but wait...
and wait...
but what happens when it becomes the most difficult thing to do
because your patience is simply...gone?
Sometimes I just wonder,
I just wonder sometimes.....